Reflections / May I Muse

It's been a while since my last May I Muse poem or analysis. 

It's been hard these past few months to write. It's been hard to sit with myself and work on understanding my emotions. 

For over a year, I have been struggling with a rather intense breakup situation. They say there are 5 stages of grief... but they don't tell you how many times you can end up going through those stages. After months of cycling through them a horrific number of times, I'm now finally moving past it after a day of fresh insight (that story will be coming soon). 

Below are two poems I wrote during my breakup. When I originally shared them with you, the emotions were far too fresh to try to analyze and publicly post (if we're being honest, I'm still questioning whether or not this is a good idea). Now, since taking time to sit with and understand them, I would like to share those analyses with you and narrate even a little more deeply into what these words meant to me. Not because I want your sympathy. Not because I hope my ex will see it and come crawling back. But because I know how alone I felt during this time...how hopeless everything seemed...and if even one person can find solace in me sharing this, that makes exposing this (incredibly intimate) information with the world worth it. 

Sending love to all the souls out there who have, are, or ever will resonate with this. 

Other poems referenced: Preparing the Heart

 

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